I have a theory that when I was a little kid–possibly even before I was born–a giant bonked me on the head with the bottom of his fist. It’s the only explanation I can come up with. My head is a gigantic enormousity. My feet are too wide for the widest shoes Nike can make. My broad shoulders make sitting next to someone in a movie theater or ball game extremely uncomfortable. Even my tonsils have been diagnosis as “unusually large” by doctors. I’ve got a six-foot-five body stuck in a five-foot-six frame. Everything it too wide. Even something as simple as buying batting gloves proves to be difficult (the sizer says my fingers are as long as a tee baller but because my wrist is wider than a sumo wrestler’s, they always rip at the seams). It’s discouraging ’cause nothing on my body fits my body. Even my wide ass doesn’t fit for someone this short–or white.
I know I don’t entirely take care of myself. I’m getting better. Now I take Tylenol when I get a headache and Tums for indigestion. But I used to just ‘tough’ out uncomfortable situations. As I get older, I’m doing a better job with things like eating healthier and not playing with reckless abandon on the softball diamond (I actually factor in the odds of getting hurt on some plays). But one thing that I never bothered with was sunblock.
As a good-looking Italian guy, I never was concerned with the sun. I got sunburn only once or twice as a kid. I don’t really tan ’cause I’m already dark-skinned. Sure, I hate the sun and vent often about its evil ways–but I never worried about being cooked.
The Girlfriend insisted that start wearing sunscreen. She said that if I get old and wrinkly she’s gonna leave my ass (what can I say: the prospect of an expensive divorce proves to be excellent motivation). I don’t wanna get old and wrinkly and spending seven or eight hours outdoors might be a tad bit too much sun exposure, so I decided to heed to her demands–err, advice. Besides, she provided me the sunblock so the only expense to me is three minutes wasted applying sunblock.
Applying sunblock is a lot like eating a salad: doing it for the first time when you’re 30 can prove to be very painful.
I don’t know when it happened, but at one point yesterday I must’ve sweated sunblock into my right eye. I can honestly say it ruined my whole day. The eye became extremely irritated–tears came out of one side, yellow gunky stuff came out the other. I put drops, flushed it with water and even put a cold soda can on it–nothing helped relieve the pain. I went to sleep last night and when I woke up, I couldn’t open my eye because all the yellow gunky stuff dried up and sealed my eye shut. The night of rest helped, but my eye is still irritated. It feels dry and scratchy–but at least I can open it today.
There’s something to be said about taking care of yourself–but I guess one shouldn’t dive into it headfirst. It’s kinda like exercising–you don’t run a marathon on your first day. I’ve had a very, very bad couple weeks; injured by salad, stung by sunblock. I better avoid the weight room at all cost.