Voting for Dummies (Our forefathers died for this?!?!?)

The elections might be finished–but I’m not. I’ve been complaining a lot about politics lately because politics is “in” nowadays. So before I return to the usual complaints and irritations, I have to get something else off my chest: people are stupid. Beyond stupid. To call people morons would be an insult to morons everywhere. No one has a dime of common sense. I simply cannot believe the stupidity in the world. People have no sense of cause and effect. Action and reaction. I don’t know how I can live in a world with people that are just so damn stupid. They make it worse for people like me–the nonstupids.

On Tuesday, California voters passed many wide-ranging measures–all of which have significant dollar amounts attached to them. “We” approved of $2 billion to go to children’s hospitals. “We” approved of $10 billon for a high speed train to connect LA and SF. I reluctantly used the word “we” because unfortunately, I get lumped together with these pinheads–but trust me, these are not measures I would have approved.

Meanwhile, Thursday–not even 48 hours after the polls closed–the governor announced that California is in serious debt and proposed a $4 billion tax hike. He said the state has no money and “we”–the taxpayers–have to make up the deficit. According to Ah-nold, we would have to stomach a 1.5 percent increase in the state’s sales tax. Depending on the county, that’s almost 10 percent Californians hafta pay in sales tax–one tenth!

Voters approved a pair of measures that are going to cost $12 billion the same week the state is $4 billion overbudget. Simply put: vote down those two measures and we’d be on the way to eliminating that deficit problem. Now I understand it’s not that simple ’cause $12 billon in bonds over 20 years doesn’t translate into $4 billion of today’s dollars–put the point remains the same. Voters approve of every spending issue they see in front of them because they think the government is gonna pay the bill. The only problem is, the government gets its money from us. So when the government spends $2 billion to save the children, we’re the ones getting the bill. Now my taxes are going up because the majority of the population still doesn’t understand there’s no such thing as a free lunch.

Speaking of “free lunches,” the cost of a meal is gonna go up because of that stupid chicken proposition. Californians overwhelmingly approved in making better lives for the chickens. Why? Why should I care about the humane treatment of something that’s gonna end up in my belly six months later? Who cares if chickens live long and fruitful lives–they’re food for cripes’ sake! The damn bleeding hearts decided to make the chickens more comfortable and now I’m the one who is going to hafta pay for it.

There’s a reason chickens live in cramped quarters: it’s cheaper. If the chickens need larger cages, that means the chicken farmers will have less space to raise chickens and their chicken output will diminish. Less output creates higher demand. Higher demand means higher prices. Higher prices means I’m gonna hafta pay more next time I got to KFC. Screw the chickens! They’re food. They’re only job in this universe is to make baby chickens and taste good. Why should anyone outside of those PETA nuts give a crap how happy the chickens are? How about my happiness when I’m eating those feathery bastards?

Something needs to be done. There needs to be an intelligence test–we can’t keep letting everyone vote. Many people out there lack basic reading, writing, and math skills…and we’re allowing them to decide the fate of the country?!?!? I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again: not everyone deserves a voice. Democracy is a wonderful idea…in theory. Majority rules! Sounds wonderful! The problem is elections and propositions have become so complicated, many people are making decisions that are well over their heads. You wouldn’t want a high school dropout to be managing a McDonalds, let alone become CEO of a major corporation. Is it okay for that same dropout to decide whether or not to spend $10 billion on a high speed train? No one ever wants to say this because you look like a monster. I don’t care–I’ll say it: too many stupid people vote and it screws up the whole process. This is why democracy is a terrible system–not everyone should have equal opinion. Democracy is a wonderful idea…in theory–but so is communism. Too many people are too stupid to vote and–unfortunately–I get lumped together with them.