Tweets « Siknerd: Home of the iRANT | funny stories, random thoughts, and many, many complaints

I’m not worried if the NSA is using my smart speaker to spy on me because most of the time Alexa doesn’t understand what I said.

I’m not worried if the NSA is using my smart speaker to spy on me because most of the time Alexa doesn’t understand what I said.

This 4th of July celebrate United States patriotism by shooting off Chinese fireworks bought in Mexico.

This 4th of July celebrate United States patriotism by shooting off Chinese fireworks bought in Mexico.

#FemaleSuperheroProblems: You’re 15 minutes late to every crime because you didn’t know what to wear.

#FemaleSuperheroProblems: You’re 15 minutes late to every crime because you didn’t know what to wear.

I’ll pay anything for good financial advice.

I’ll pay anything for good financial advice.

I spend most of my days wondering if I’m self-absorbed.

I spend most of my days wondering if I’m self-absorbed.

Everyone knows real Italians don’t come from Italy–they’re from New Jersey.

Everyone knows real Italians don’t come from Italy–they’re from New Jersey.

I spend all day wondering if I’m self-absorbed.

I spend all day wondering if I’m self-absorbed.

I swear that’s the last time I make unrealistic promises.

I swear that’s the last time I make unrealistic promises.

I swear that’s the last time I make unrealistic promises.

I swear that’s the last time I make unrealistic promises.

I don’t know who I despise more: teenagers or Mexicans.

I don’t know who I despise more: teenagers or Mexicans.