Twitter Quip

    Attention Craigslist Shoppers: Don’t Call Me

    So think I killed someone recently. It was not my intent to kill them (that would be first degree murder), but rather a course of circumstances that I was involved in lead to their probable death (second degree manslaughter–a far lighter sentence). But we’ll get to that in a moment.

    Recently I attempted to sell a mobile phone I was no longer using. A year ago it was top of the line, but I didn’t care much for it and hardly used it (I’m old school: I need a keyboard). I posted the phone on craigslist for $200 because they were selling for about $250 on eBay and I saw nothing cheaper than $240 on craigslist.

    Ahh craigslist…it’s a great place to buy and sell goods. Unfortunately, you have to deal with craigslist people. I don’t think highly of craigslist people: you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy outside of craigslist. Sure, craigslist is great when you’re trading with a decent person. But in my experience, 95 percent of craiglisters are illiterate, stupid, cheap, rude, dishonest, or just downright annoying.

    Part of it is my doing. I sell things cheap so I’m dealing with . . . . .

     

    Car, phones, and being rude (these are a few of my favorite things)

    I haven’t had much to be proud of lately. I work at a job that suits the financial needs of a teenager. I haven’t had a good haircut since 2008. I’m a burden on society and take more in government aid than I pay in taxes. But I can proudly proclaim I had a gas-free October. I filled up my gas tank on November 2nd. The last time I bought gas before that was September 23rd–meaning I did not buy gas for the entire month of October. Driving a highly fuel-efficient Honda played a big part in that, but I’ve had the car for almost four years and I’ve been getting 35 miles per gallon from the beginning. I was able to go six weeks in between fill-ups thanks to a perfect storm of events that left my car at home more often than not (no, it didn’t break down–it’s a Honda). Since I’m only taken one class, I only go to school once a week. October was filled with rainouts and byes, so I had only a couple softball games all month. And since work is a mere four-minute walk, it’d be wasteful to drive there. I typically go . . . . .

     

    Horrible person thought of the day

    I’ll be the first to admit I’m not an important person. Stock markets don’t crash without me; lives aren’t lost if I can’t be found. Yet here I am–one individual–with four phone numbers that are solely for my use. I have a home phone that I never use (a requirement to have DSL), a personal cell phone, a work-issued cell phone, and an office line. One person, four phone numbers. No wonder we keep running out of area codes.

    Imagine if I had any importance.

    Heath Ledger died this week. I’m neither happy nor sad by this news. From what I’ve been told, he was a pretty good actor–but I wouldn’t know. The only thing I ever saw him in was “Ten Things I Hate About You” (it was for an English class–I swear). But like I said, I’m pretty apathetic to his death. The Fiancee thinks I’m a horrible person because I don’t think his death is sad. Why would I think it’s sad? It doesn’t affect me. People die all the time and society is never sad for the countless 28-year old nobodies who die on a daily basis. Maybe if I knew Heath Ledger or saw a . . . . .