What’s the point in making my two year-old brush her teeth when they’re all gonna get replaced in five years?
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#DescribeAFriendLikeACar: The backseat sags a little and she’s always leaking fluids. #EveryoneTellsMe, “You need to wear pants if you want to shop here.” The words “social” and “media” meant something very different 20 years ago. #SocialMediaTaughtMe #ThingsYouDontAccept…Items that cost more than 99 cents at the @99Only Store. C’mon guys–it’s in your name: “99¢ Only”! I’m fairly certain the only reason I watched “ThunderCats” was because it was on. #HonestReportCards: I’ll be surprised if your son doesn’t end up being serial killer. #HonestReportCards: Her best hope is that her looks carry her through college and she marries rich before she turns 25. #HonestReportCards: The mere fact that she’s not pregnant by now is a tremendous accomplishment! I worry that the Greeks were right and we’ve been praying to the wrong god(s) for the past 2000 years. |
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