Know what I hate? I mean besides communists and people who don't know how to drive. I absolutely hate people who look the same in every picture they take. And I'm sorry ladies, but you're the top violator of this crime. It bugs the hell outta me when I'm looking at pictures of a chik and virtually ever picture looks the same. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about: the kinda girl who has a "look" for cameras. She smiles a certain way, tilts her head at the exact same angle; and always shows her "good side." There have been times when I've been looking through a girl's photo album that ranged five years yet every single stinking photo looks the same. I think it's so phony--show me a real friggin' smile for cripes sake! These broads are Derek Zoolander only nowhere near as pretty.

So I think I'm turning into a dinosaur. It's not that I'm becoming green and scaly; it's more like my time has passed and there's nothing I can do but watch others roam where I used to rule. When I was a teenager, I always used to laugh at those guys with long hair that loved Journey. I laughed at them because how outdated they were. I didn't laugh because I thought Journey's music is bad (it is), but because Journey was so in the past. I couldn't understand why those guys wouldn't get hip with the times and start listening to Bush. Here I am today, entering my mid-20s (in my mind) and without realizing it, I became one of those aging hippies I always mocked.

During my car ride home from Phoenix this weekend, I was given the always tedious--yet important--task of being DJ. Armed with an iPod and the finest taste of music around, I was ready to make the five-hour car ride as rockingly hip as possible. Midway through our journey, I heard someone from the backseat yell, "Hey, enough with the 90s music--can we hear something else?"

I thought I was just playing good music. I thought I was just playing classically good songs. It's funny 'cause you hear a song--listen to it through the years--but without even knowing it, the song becomes a thing of the past. Take No Doubt: their "Tragic Kingdom" album was one of the bestselling albums of its time. Everyone I knew had it. It had a ton of singles and lots of great songs. I listen to it probably once a month--I've been doing it ever since I bought it. Time passes. The songs still seem hip and current to me but without me even realizing it, 11 years have passed.

It floored me to discover that it was released in 1995--a lifetime ago. It doesn't seem like 11 years ago but that's probably because time doesn't stop. I'm moving forward and getting older, yet No Doubt and the gang are firmly entrenched in 1995. That's just weird. Back in '95, there weren't any ten-year old songs that had any meaning to me--and certainly nothing as significant as No Doubt is today. Why back in '95, any music ten years old always sounded ten years old. It was dated and you could tell it was old based on the style and sound. And yet today, No Doubt and other artists from '95 still feel "new" to me.

Has time passed me by or is my time just in the past? When I drive my car, if I'm not listening to conservative talk radio, I'm jamming to songs older than Dakota Fanning. Some might say it's dated or unhip, but I'm oblivious to it. I wish I could hear it from their ears (kind of the way I can hear the 80s in Journey). I'm curious to hear how Pearl Jam, The Offspring, and Smashing Pumpkins can sound old. It all sounds so ludicrous to me--probably the way that Journey fan felt in '95.

I'm a dinosaur, stuck in the tar pit life. The world is changing and I'm staying right where I am.