The Olympics start this week...but does anyone really care? Do you know anybody who actually gets excited about the Olympics? I don't know anyone who watches. Outside the big-name events (men's basketball and Michael Phelps) I don't know anyone who cares. I certainly don't care. There's no fun in watching someone run around a track. There's only so many times I can watch a person swim in a pool (zero). There are very few mainstream events in our society that are as past their prime as the Olympics. I truly believe no one gives a crud...other than the athletes involved. If the world were to somehow skip an Olympics, do you think anyone would even notice? I don't.

---

Recently I was sitting outside a very rich and classy hotel. It was one of those expensive joints--the kinda place where two nights cost more than I pay in month for rent. Normally I wouldn't be caught dead near such an establishment, but an assignment for work put me at the hotel's entrance for a few hours. Since my job isn't challenging, I had little to do other than watch numerous cars come to the valet and wait to get parked. It was your stuck-up, rich person, vehicle guidebook. There were Mercedes and BMWs--a given at an event of this nature. There were even a few assholes in Bentleys and Italian sports cars.

What is it about rich people? What world do they live in? Don't they realize by driving such a car they're merely a cliché--a representation of everything normal folks hate about rich people? It makes me sick. These people all have way too much money and love to do everything in their power to flaunt it. What makes them behave that way? How are they wired? And the way the hotel staff catered to them made me sick...it was disgusting. Everyone was greeted as 'sir' or 'madam'--like they're some sorta royalty. I couldn't believe people get off on this shit! I wouldn't wanna be treated that way. It's a line everyone says but if I had that kinda money that's not the kinda life I'd live. I'm a man of the people (even though I hate the people). I wouldn't be a part of this--I have a soul.

I don't care for valet parking for many, many reasons. Being cheap is part of it. Even if I go somewhere that offers free valet parking, I still gotta give the guy a tip. But I think the biggest thing is that I'm just bothered by the whole concept of it. I have two legs and am able to walk. I learned how to drive when I was 16 and learned how to park when I was 17--I don't need anyone to park my care. Valet parking feels so elitist. "I'm too good to bother with trivial things like parking my car--I'll pay one of the peasants to do it for me." I don't like that kinda pampering--I don't think anyone is that much better than anyone else (including myself).

I might only drive a 95 Honda, but I hate the idea of anyone else driving my car. I know it sounds stupid. Valet parkers are professionals. They'll park cars for more expensive than mine. Still...I just don't trust anyone with my car but me. I treat my car a certain way. I drive it a certain way. I don't want anyone behind the wheel but me. This includes valets, mechanics, family members (especially family members), or the president of Honda--it doesn't matter. The idea of anyone driving my car other than me makes me incredibly uneasy.

I saw something at that hotel that reinforces my discomfort with valet parking. Some rich dame exited car and left the engine running. She gathered her belongings (mainly shopping bags from upscale design stores). The valet handed her a ticket...and accidentally closed the car door behind her. Before anybody could realize what happened, the doors locked--with the keys in the ignition and the engine running. The valet assured her everything would be fine and that she should go to her room. It was amusing to watch the wide range of emotions (confusion, embarrassment, outrage) at such an upscale hotel. Eventually things calmed down--but the car ran idly until AAA could come and pop the lock. All in all, very amusing...and yet another reason to avoid valet parking.

© 2008 siknerd.com