As people get older, they get less emotional.  Actually, that might just be a broad generalization--but I know it applies to me.  While I know I'm a unique individual, I pretty sure I'm not the only person to show less emotion as the years add up.

Oh my god--I'm gonna be like 30 in two years.  Thirty--no wonder 37-year old women are hitting on me.  I'm gonna cry.  I can't get older--no way.  I mean look at me--do I do anything a 30-year old would do?  I play video games, hang out with 20-year olds, and have no desire to get married, have kids, or start a family.  I can't be 30--it's no fair.  There's so much that I haven't done!  And there's so much that I don't wanna do.  If I continue the lifestyle I have now when I'm 30, I'll just come off as creepy and perverted.  I can't turn 30--I just can't do it!  I'm not gonna be one of those people who celebrates his 29^th birthday every year--but I'm sure as hell not turning 30!  I won't allow it.  I'll will myself to not turn 30--or become an honorary Orkan and start counting backwards.

Oh god--it's horrible.

I coulda sworn I started off talking about something.  Ah yes, emotions.  I don't know if it comes with getting older, but I just don't get emotionally about much of anything anymore ('cept for anger--a lot of things still piss me off).  I remember being a kid was fun--even my childhood.  I got excited about stuff.  I had fun.  Christmas, birthdays, movies, girls--stuff like that.  There'd be times at night when I couldn't fall asleep because I met a chik I was totally crazy about.  Or Christmas Eve.

But now, nothing excites me.  I feel like nothing gets my juices really flowing.  No girl keeps me up anymore.  Birthday's keep me up only 'cause I'm another year older (30!).  Nothing really excites me--baseball season starts in about six weeks and I feel numb.

I'm not fully discarding the possibility of it being solely me (gonna talk to my mom and ask her if old people get excited).  In my youth, I was an overly excited kid.  When I eagerly awaited something, I was giddy.  I know I worked hard to keep my emotions in check ('specially 'round women) so maybe there's a chance I took it too far the other way and now I don't sow any emotion.  But I don't think that's the case.  I think it's a product of getting older.

Maybe when you're a grownup, you just get used to it all.  After 20 Christmases, there's nothing to get excited for.  After a few go rounds of dabbling in women and dating, the novelty of meting someone new is gone.  I don't know--I'm an idiot and certainly not suited to come up with these answers.  All I know is I wish I was a kid again.  I wanna feel that way again.  Excited.  Scared.  Happy.  Giddy.  Nervous (well, maybe not that one).  But I hate feeling dead inside. 

Nanu-Nanu!