siknerd.com - Home of the World Famous iRANT

What is the proper etiquette when flatuating on the toilet? At home, when youre alone, the answer is obvious (take a deep breath and admire your handiwork). But what about when about when your sitting on the toilet at a public restroom? In any other circumstance in any other part of the world, the answer is already clear-cut. Anytime wind is broken at an audible level loud enough for another to hear, it is polite to say "excuse me" and move on.

But I think on a public toilet is a completely different situation. Begging for pardon or saying "excuse me" feels like a half-hearted courtesy amongst the grunts and plops of lavatory noises. No matter how polite you may want to be, it just creates an uncomfortable situation.

Proper manners is just part of good etiquette, but it seems silly to say "excuse me" when baking an air biscuit only to completey ignore loud "grrrrrrs" and heavy breathing.

Ive always tried to maintain as much class as possible when in the latrine. Every guy knows never to talk to another man while at the urinal and to leave a sock on the stall door if youre with a woman. But Ive never felt comfortable or came up with a solution regarding flatuating. Whether youre one doing it or the guy next to you sounds like hes playing with a whoopee cushion, its just a situation that makes both parties uncomfortable.

* I haven't written in a while and this is the best I could come up with?

Older iRANT

Newer iRANT

2006