siknerd.com - Home of the World Famous iRANT

I really need to put an iRANT up. I really haven't felt like posting stuff since I've gotten back from Vegas. I've written tons of stuff--I just haven't felt like posting it. Part of me is wondering why I bother. After all, I write for me--not my reader (no S). And I gotta be sure when I put something up, I don't reveal anything that could come back to bite me on the ass. I never give the real names of any characters in the plot of my life. I gotta be sure not to reveal and deep, dark personal stuff (and yes, there is a lot more skeletons in the closet than listed here). Plus, I foolishly gave my URL to a coworker this week--again (what can I say: I can't resist the allure of a hot chik...or anyone who gives me the time of day). All in all, I've been writing--I just haven't felt like posting. Well enough is enough--my reader (no S) is gonna be disappointed if I don't put something up.

I am shocked at the amount of press Anna Nicole Smith is getting. Don't get me wrong--I like "Naked Gun 33 1/3" just as much as the next guy. But this story. For something that feels like it should be reserved for the gossip columns, it's been the lead story for two days. I've even seen a couple stations put memorial stills--like we've lost an American icon.

What's the appeal behind this? Who really cares? She wasn't even a third-rate actress--Kevin Bacon probably does more films in a year than she did in her "career." I can't see anyone missing her--at least not anyone I'm friends with. It's not like she's ever done anything (which would make Anna like Paris Hilton only double the size). Why is the media even covering this story?

Unless there's more to it. She seemed awfully young to die mysteriously like that. Maybe we're dealing with a celebrity murder here. But that wouldn't explain why the media talks about her as if she was "beloved."

My nose is big, uh-uh I'm not ashamed
Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid
I get laid by the ladies, ya know I'm in charge,
both how I'm livin' and my nose is large.
--Digital Underground

Despite all the things I hate about the 80s (bad movies, worse clothes, and don't even get me started on the hair), a couple of good things were born during the Reagan years--Amanda Byrnes and Jennie Finch, to name a couple. The 80s also had some really good television shows ("The A-Team," "Cheers"). And I absolutely love 80s rap music.

For those who know me, it's kind of an odd liking. I generally despise music from the 80s (Flock of Seagulls anyone?) and this white boy doesn't care too much for rap music. Perhaps the two negatives cancel each other out 'cause when I hear Tone Loc tell it, I just wanna do the wild thing.

Rap music wasn't born in the 80s, but that's when it started to get popular (credit "Yo MTV Raps!"). I think the music scene was in dire need of a change. That synthesized-heavy garbage was just awful (I hated it then and I hate it today). The pop stars sung whinny ballads that were as empty as my fridge. The music industry probably welcomed the change.

Rap back then was so much better because it was more fun. The hip-hop music today is about busting caps and banging ho's. But 80s rap was more comical--artist like Young MC and Biz Markie poked fun at themselves and life. Before the Fresh Prince started getting Oscar nominations, he was making records with DJ Jazzy Jeff and reminding all of us that parents just don't understand.

I think what made it better was how it was produced. More emphasis was placed on lyrics and rhymes than today's rap songs. Most of the 80s rhymes sound like they coulda been recorded in a bathroom--meaning they were simple and showcased the artist's talent more than the beats. But today's rap mixes and samples and uses computers to create music--it's overproduced and the lyrics have become an afterthought. Plus it's like every rap song has numerous "guests stars" and get remixed by Lil Jon.

That's probably why I like Marshall Mathers so much. His music is more 80s than thug rap. The lyrics are comical and he just has fun doing it. 'Cause that's what music should be about--having fun. Bragging about how many times you've been shot or how many bitches you've impregnated isn't really interesting--at least not to this middle-class white boy. But when you see your girl talking "just a friend"--that's a problem any guy can relate to.